3.28.2010

Poultry Yolks!

Just some silly chicken jokes:

What happened when the hen ate cement?
She laid a sidewalk.

What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes!

What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.

Why did the chicken disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.

Why did the rooster file for divorce?
He was tired of being hen-pecked.

Is chicken soup excellent for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.

What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics!

Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.

Which day of the week do chickens despise most?
Fry-day.

What do you call a chicken with a disability?
Hendicapped.

What do call a chicken who got too close to a nuclear plant?
Atomic cluck.

Why did the rooster stay outside dring the blizzard?
It was ‘fowl’ weather.

Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.

Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
With four doors it would be a chicken sedan.

Why did the chicken cross the playground?
It wanted to get to the other slide.

Why did the chicken cross the internet?
It wanted to get to the other site.

What do you call a rooster who wakes you up?
An alarm cluck.

What does an alarm cluck say?
Tick-tock-a-doodle-doo!

What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo clock.

Why is it simple for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.

What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.

Why did the rooster run away?
He was chicken.

Why don’t chickens like people?
Because we beat eggs.

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a duck?
A bird that lays down.

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.

What happened to the chicken whose feathers pointed the incorrect way?
She was tickled to death.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
She wanted to see a man lay a brick.

What does a chicken wipe his beak with?
A henkerchief.

What time do chickens go to lunch?
Twelve o cluck.

Why did the chicken cross the state line?
To get out of Kentucky.

Which religious man do chickens dread most?
The friar.

How do you know when a chicken is under arrest?
She’s wearing hencuffs.

Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
Because it was stuck to the chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.

Why didn’t the chicken skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have enough guts.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens hadn’t evolved yet.

Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the shell station.

Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.

How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To prove to the possum that it could be done.

Why did the chicken end up in the soup?
Because it ran out of cluck.

Why did the cow cross the road?
To go to the moooooovies.

What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours.

What do you get if you cross a chicken with a bell?
A bird that has to ring its own neck.

What do you get if you cross a hen with a dog?
Pooched eggs.

Why were the hens lying on their backs with their legs in the air?
Because eggs were going up.

How do chickens dance?
Chick to chick.

Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.

Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?
Because she was worried someone would caesar!

Why did the unwashed chicken cross the road twice?
Because he was a dirty double crosser.

What do you call a joke book for chickens?
A yolk book.

Why did the rooster cross the road?
To cockadoodle dooo something.

Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.

What did the chicken do when he saw a bucket of fried chicken?
He kicked the bucket.

What do you get from a drunk chicken?
Scotch eggs!

Why does a rooster watch TV?
For hentertainment.

How do you stop a rooster from crowing on Sunday?
Eat him on Saturday!

2 comments:

Nikki said...

the philosophical dilemma is finally solved.
which came first?
the eggplant.
Thanks for clearing that up for me.

Sam the Yam! said...

I knew you would appreciate my chickens sooner or later Nicole!

Sam the YAM & Allie

Sam the YAM & Allie

Sam the Y.A.M

Y.our A.mes M.edia Network (Y.A.M.)This is a blog set up for the Ames Families in Boise, Nibley, Perry, St. George, and Arizona, to keep in touch better and see what is happening in the family. Email anything you want submitted to the Editor. Thank you. Sam

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